The Stoning of Stephen

I was standing there in front of all these men, the council as they are called, and I had just finished my story. I was accused of wrongdoing but have never spoken anything apart from the teachings of the apostles. My heart had been poured out completely. The fathers of old never lost sight of their purpose, however, I was beginning to understand what it must have been to experience the anxiety of their incredible situations. I told these men nothing they had not already known about the saints of the past. It was not until I called them murderers that they really began to get heated. But, is that not what they did: murder?

I have never seen such hatred. All around me were eyes that seemed to pierce my soul. However, it was as if the hatred could only go "this far and no further"...reminds me of the mighty command to the oceans described to Saint Job. An inexplicable boldness and confidence reigned in my inmost being.

The shouting continued...deafening were their screams. I can only compare the intensity to what I imagine the torment of hell to be...murderous screeching of the most horrible and putrifying kind. They yelled for my life, those countless who wanted to take it. O but a taste of the burden Christ bore. I, a mere man, sinful yet saved by the blood of the God-Man, almost collapsed in fear. What more the sinless and innocent Son of Man must have felt.

I could take it no longer. My soul was going to leave its earthly vessel due to purely emotional anguish. I was going to give in. Then, it happened. Words can hardly capture. I can only compare to the coolness of spring this wind that enveloped me. Not just any breeze I felt. No, every limb, every corner of my body was strengthened. Even greater than this, my soul was refreshed and I realized like never before what power dwelt within me.

Only stories of this shaking wind had accurately conveyed to me this Comforter. Yet, today I experienced like never before that which I knew had always been. My eyes could no longer look at the faces of men for they were being drawn upward. It was not so much that I could not resist, but that the most natural reaction was to lift my head. No other reaction would have made sense.

What could this be? No longer did I see an enclosed building but the opening to the Glory of Glories! "I should not be seeing this," I thought. Nothing could draw me away. This is where I belonged. Home was up. Rest awaited me there. Then I saw...Him. I saw Him!! The King, the Lamb, the Mighty Warrior, He was not sitting as He said He would be until we joined Him. No, HE STOOD!

What did I ever do to deserve this? That's right, I deserved not one ounce of acknowledgement let alone recognition and honor. My mouth could only speak of what I saw. No other subject warranted my words. My eyes were only broken of this divine sight by the multitude of men who were casting me out of the court. My body was no longer mine. I was completely at the mercy of humanity; if they were capable of any in the first place.

My eyes went from gazing glory to staring at the dust. I knew that I would soon return to that from which I had been formed. And so it began.

The first stone hit my body with such force that I knew I would never walk again if I lived. The searing pain raged through my leg like an unquenchable fire. I tried to gather my breath but was met with two more stones to my chest. Blood spewed from my mouth and nose. Gasping only brought panic to my mind. There was no time to think. What could I say? I was not going to exist much longer. I cried out to my only Refuge; pleading with the Lord to take me.

Stone after stone. How long could a man survive so much trauma? My gaze began to blur as I laid in a grave of mud soaked in my own blood. The pain seemed to multiply with each blow and then be multiplied once again as if there was no limit to my torment.

"Is this justice," I thought, "This is blessed in His sight? What could be further from joy?" My mind wrestled with my heart. It was here in my heart that I found the answer. It is was not the strength of my person amidst torture that brought glory to God but the endurance and trust within my soul that brought a smile to the face of the King. Sure, it was a smile soaked in tears, but a smile nonetheless.

My heart would not give in and curse these men. I was given an opportunity to proclaim Christ's victory over death or to curse His creation and give the Evil One satisfaction in his wickedness. From the depths of my being I prayed earnestly for one last chance. I only needed one more sentence. That mighty wind surged one more time. My heart was on my lips while poison dripped from everyone else's. "LORD, DO NOT HOLD THIS SIN AGAINST THEM!"

That was the end. I slipped into silence only to instantly awaken. I was home.

It's not like you would think. It's not like I now live in gratitude that I no longer hurt. No, to think like that would be to think on earthly terms. Rather, my mind has been elevated. I have entered into a fullness that I never knew existed. All that was good on earth does not compare with this goodness. What I said was awesome on earth is by no means awesome in comparison with this place.

I have been lifted up. To dwell on anything of the past is to diminish the present. I am simply at rest. No other activity would be logical. Better put, not resting in my activity would be a poor excuse for activity in the first place. No, I have been elevated. What I once saw from below I now see from on high. This is not just a taste. This is the fullness of all things good.